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Posts Tagged ‘Jack Handy’

My Jack Handy Moments: Another Reflection… or….

April 19th, 2011 Comments off

I cannot attest to the fact that this isn’t photoshopped, but it’s been around the web enough to make me think it’s legitimate. So I’m just going to stand back and say “Whoa.”

My Jack Handy Moments: Whoah, dude

April 8th, 2010 Comments off

Anyone who says the eye has been intelligently designed need only be reminded of two things: 1) it only registers as visible a small band of electromagnetic radiation and 2) it is incredibly subject to optical illusion and cognitive bias in recognition.  In other words, we often see what we want to see or are easily manipulated to see what others want us to see.

Optical illusions are a total “Whoah, dude” moment because you can know exactly what you’re tricked into seeing (“It’s not a schooner… it’s a sailboat.”) and still be completely at the mercy of the photos.  This is because the authors of images either intentionally or coincidentally play on the fact that the human brain (and the eye in particular) attempts to be efficient and in doing so takes shortcuts in processing data based on what you would expect to see.

Here are some of my favorites.

I still have a hard time believing this isn't a spiral. You will too.

More “blow your mind” after the break. Read more…

My Jack Handy Moments: Buffalo, etc.

December 15th, 2009 Comments off
Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.

Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.

OK, so this is a little less of a Deep Thought and more of a mind f*ck.  I learned by chance this week that the following is a real, honest to god sentence:

Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.

No, seriously, that’s it.  That’s a legit sentence.  Break it out by substitution and it becomes intelligible.  The wiki entry is not really much of a help, but it does tell you how to substitute (by just subbing the noun versions and changing the verb version to “bully”).  Essentially, you have three uses of Buffalo:

  1. The city Buffalo
  2. The noun meaning plural buffalo
  3. The verb meaning “to bully”

So with that context, and replacing the noun with other animals, you get the following:

Buffalo geese [that] Buffalo ducks bully bully Buffalo chickens.

Yeah, I’m just flabbergasted that “Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.”

My Jack Handy Moments: Alan Thicke was a crappy Dad

December 8th, 2009 Comments off

So ABC tried to convince us for eight years that Alan Thicke (as Dr. Jason Seaver) was the greatest dad in the world.  He and Joanna Kerns’ Maggie Malone raised the perfect family that dealt rationally with all the issues life faced them with.

But here’s the problem.  Little Ben had a nervous breakdown halfway through the series’ run at 10 years old and later couldn’t cut it and dropped out of USC… Benji the dog could enroll and get through USC.

Carol was a nutcase on the show and was certifiable as the poster child for anorexia nervosa in real life.  500-calorie a day diets will do that.

And Mike… good old Mike went off the deep end and became a born again nutcase who’s mission in life is to link Darwin and Hitler and to fight atheism (and rational thought) anywhere he might find it.

So my conclusion is that Dr. Jason Seaver was… and you, Mr. Alan Thicke, are… a really crappy dad (and an even worse psychologist).

My Jack Handy Moments: Flying

November 23rd, 2009 Comments off

Do you ever stop to think of just how ridiculous flying jets are? I mean really, you’re in an over pressurized, aluminum tube that is hyper-oxygenated and pumped full of high octane fuel. You are then propelled by friggin’ jet engines at 40,000 feet.

And that’s a safer way to travel than walking down Lexington Avenue.