The Onion has been king of satire for a very, very long time now. Even in the age of John Stewart and Stephen Colbert, the Onion launched the superior OnionNewsNetwork.
One staple they’ve continued to run out is their mocking of The USA Today and its infographics. After the jump, I’ve got two of their infographics from the Onion Sports Network, addressing those bastion of collegiate athletics: John Wall of Kentackalacky and The Lamb of God of Florida.
Although I took this to be only a joke, apparently women's groups are actually protesting the ad (though I think it's largely because of the unspoken message).
This blog’s post on TLOG? Not so much. In January, I wrote about Tim Tebow making a huge mistake by doing a pro-life ad for Focus on the Family (I also made a remark that irked some by calling it an anti-abortion ad, I apologized to those good folk). Anyways, the ad finally aired last night and it showed me I shouldn’t doubt the Lamb of God.
The ad was remarkably sterile and pretty boring. In fact, it was shot like a cheesy Match.com ad and contained zero controversy (other than naming Pam Tebow as the co-winner of the 2007 Heisman). Anyways, the Greatest Collegiate Footballer will live to fight another PR day and the ad certainly could not offend even the most pro-choice of advocates.
Here, Tebow is seen ascending above the field while playing the Barn.
There was, apparently, an eleventh commandment. That commandment instructed that Thou Shalt Not Doubt Tim Tebow. This was certainly true when the Chosen One was at Nease High and walking on water throughout the Swamp in Gainesville. On his way to two national championships and three appearances (and one win) at the Downtown Athletic Club’s Heisman Awards, Tebow always came out on top, both as a player and as a representative of his Evangelical faith.
Many have run afoul of this commandment throughout the years. Clay Travis became a pariah when he asked Tebow, straight up, if he was saving himself for marriage at SEC Media Days in Birmingham this past Fall. Opposing defenses were taught not to doubt the power of the jump pass and Les Miles and crew never quite learned. In 2008, defensive coordinators were shown you couldn’t try to stack the box against the Holy Moyel’s awkward passing delivery. And, in a modern day ascension to the draft, Tebow shattered noted headcase Vince Young’s BCS record for total yards in this year’s Sugar Bowl with 533.
The commissioner of the SEC (the Southern Fat Cat one, not the Wall Street Fat Cat one) sent out an edict last week stating that it was no longer open season on officials. This year, we’ve seen more criticism of officiating than is the norm.
Your Mississippi States, Kentuckys and Vanderbilts have always been on the short end of the stick when playing conference elites, but I tend to agree with Philip from Save the Shield‘s view that this is probably subconscious bias and not outright conspiracy. Well, Lane Kiffin (Tennessee) and others started promoting the idea that it was outright conspiracy and an effort to get Florida and Bama into the Georgia Dome undefeated. Dan Mullen (MSU) and Kiffin were each reprimanded, though the SEC ignored the very valid complaints of Bobby Johnson (Vanderbilt) that same week — probably because Johnson only suggested incompetence and not conspiracy.